This is a rant. It popped into my mind as I was getting ready for uni, and it wouldn’t leave me alone on the way in, and I know it’ll bother me all day if I don’t get it off my chest. Of course, now that I’ve ranted the hell out of it in my head, it won’t sound quite as good now, as I’ve probably forgotten most of my points.
Why is it that guys and girls feel the need to act different around members of whichever sex they find attractive? And I don’t mean (the equally, if not more ridiculous) games like ‘you must not call them within 3.4 days of last seeing them’.
I’ve found that with some of the guys that have liked me (that I’ve known for certain – i.e. because they told me) they seem to feel the need to be… patronising. I. Can’t. Stand. It. It makes me want to scream. And strangle someone. It’s not a good reaction to get from someone you want to date, seriously. With the guys I know this has so far manifested itself in two ways.
Seriously, rolling your eyes over everything I say is not a way to make me like you. If everything I say makes you roll your eyes, why do you even like me in the first place? If that was my reaction to someone, if all they said I found ridiculous, and I had so little respect for them that I’d show my view of what they say, I wouldn’t even be friends with them, and if I somehow found myself dating them, I’d probably slit my wrists. So, this makes me think that in fact, despite their eyes doing somersaults in their sockets, they don’t actually think everything I say is ridiculous, for if they had any sense, they wouldn’t like me if they did. So it might be some sort of macho display of… something that seems good in their heads. Heaven forbid you express interest in what the person you like is saying, your emotions will be somehow be negated if you don’t treat them like they’re a retard. If you do this, and you know you do this, stop it. Stop it right now. And if you do it to me, do so with the full realisation that I will detest you, and never mind dating me, we will not even be friends. There’s also the chance some guys do not realise they do it, maybe it’s some sort of nervous thing. In which case, get on top of it!
Other times, guys feel the need to disagree with everything you say, even if they actually have the same opinion as you. In which case they decide that your approach is wrong and disagree with you anyway, or act like you don’t understand the issue. And then they won’t leave it alone, when, in an attempt to salvage your friendship, you try changing the topic. But they will not let you. They will continue until you never want to see them again. It seems to be the same thing here – if you have such disregard for what I say, why bother being around me? If you don’t actually have a problem with what I say, stop disagreeing for the sake of disagreeing! I think some guys are under the misapprehension that girls find this somehow impressive. They don’t. You look like a giant cock. So stop it.
Girls are just as bad, but in a different way. With a lot of my female friends, my cool, down to earth, independent friends, whose entire personalities change the second a
cock boy comes along. So while guys do their best to put down the girls they’re interested in, in an attempt to impress them no doubt, girls start acting like they suddenly can’t do anything. They will start giggling, batting their eyelashes, coyly looking away, pouting and making their voices higher and/or doing a cutesy voice. Why? Must you really appeal to a man’s genetically implanted need to protect? Most of the guys I know find it really annoying, it doesn’t make them inclined to like the girl any more. If they already like her, they do like it, but only because they like her, and if she acted like herself, they’d still like her. What annoys me even more about it, is the sudden change. They’ll be all normal, and themselves, and suddenly a guy, not necessarily a guy they even like, but just a guy, and suddenly they’re acting like a cross between Paris Hilton and some subservient big eyed manga heroine. Stop it. What will you do when you’re dating a guy? Will you spend the rest of your life pretending to be something you’re not? If he likes you, he’ll like those wobbly bits, he won’t mind when you occasionally forget to shave, and he definitely won’t mind you not acting like an airhead idiot.
In a nutshell, what I’m saying is: Be yourself. And don’t be an idiot.